I seem to remember Newsweek or some magazine like that doing a story about the lengthening of adolecensce a few years back, so I don't think it's just in your head.

I've often seen it blamed on current Western culture. In some tribal cultures, there's a big ceremony when a child turns 12, or 15, or whatever age is picked by that culture as being the 'age of adulthood' (and it is invariably a much lower age than what most of us would consider "adult") and the child is ritually scarred or some part of his body is chopped off (and here I'm thinking "foreskin" and shuddering to myself) or maybe people give him gifts or he has to give other people gifts or whatever. But from that day forward, the "child" is treated as an adult. You go through the ceremony, you become an adult, and the next day everyone who was calling you the tribal equivalent of "sonny" or "bub" now calls you by your first name and treats you as an equal instead of an inferior or a child. It's a hard-and-fast deliniation. One day, you're a child, the next, you're an adult, with all the rights, privledges, and burdens that go along with that.

We don't have anything like that in Western culture. The closest we probably ever had was high school graduation, but with more and more people going off to college now instead of entering the workforce right out of high school, 'childhood' can easily be extended into and even beyond college. People don't *know* when to stop calling you "sonny" or "bub" unless *you* tell them in our society--and that puts the onus on growing up on the person doing the growing up rather than on the society as a whole. And the fact is, a lot of people (and although I've done my fair share of growing up, I'd have to lump myself into this category as well) simply don't *want* to grow up.

And I think that right there goes a long way towards answering the question. I think the fact is that more and more people are simply choosing to postpone "adulthood" because either they percieve it as "too hard" or they're just emotionally incapable of handling the responsibilities of being an adult. However, I'm not precisely sure what causes this. Is the world harder to live in today than it was 25 years ago? I dunno, 25 years ago I was 3. Maybe Howard can answer that. But to me the simple fact is more and more people choose to postpone adulthood and society is more and more accepting of that choice than ever before. I can't say exactly why this is, but I *can* say at least that it *is*.

What I remember of that aforementioned Newsweek story is that it profiled a bunch of people who were still living with their parents long after they became "adults" by almost anyone's standards. I think they mostly focused on late 20s early 30s people still living with the folks. The one thing I remember most about the article, though was this one guy who seemed *proud* to still be sponging off his parents. He was quoted as saying something like "hey, the rent is free and so is the food. You can't beat that." And when questioned as to why, even taking into account the free rent and food, he didn't have any desire to move out and be on his own two feet like pretty much everyone else his age, he said something like "I simply couldn't afford the lifestyle I've come to be accustomed to if I had to pay for food and rent." Not only was I disgusted by this guy, but I was disgusted by his parents who seemingly happily supported him. Sure, he had a good, full-time job--but he contributed nothing to the household. His mother still did his laundry, cooked his food, washed his dishes, and picked up after him.

As for my own experience, I have to say it's mixed. I essentially left home at 17 to go away to school, but still stuck very close to "home" for two or three more years. I nearly flunked out my first semester at college, and I was one of those people (that others in this thread are lambasting) who was at college simply because I couldn't think of anything better to be doing. I went away to school because I thought it was expected of me, and it seemed like the natural progression. When I got there and found out I'd have to be doing some growing up if I were to get through it, it was quite a shock at first. My parents were very supportive, but also very insistent in their own way that I make up my own mind about things. My mother had just one rule--if I was going to live in her house, I had to have a job or be going to school. It was my choice as to which, and for me it was easy--the only job I'd ever known up until that point I basically hated, and so school was the only other option.

I look back on it now and realize I could have just as easily chosen "job" and dropped out. It's concieveable that I might still be there, working a meaningless job, unable or unwilling to move out, my parents becoming increasingly fed up with the whole situation but being their usual supportive selves. But I really don't think it would have worked out that way. Part of the reason I chose "school" was becuase I didn't *want* to stay at home anymore. I knew I wanted out even if I didn't know exactly how that worked or didn't understand exactly what I was getting into by choosing that path.

I dunno. It's all to scary to think of sometimes. I think I'll stop now.

-- Dave