So I'm sitting here, and I'm thinking to myself, "I have absolutely no thoughts running through my head at this time." Naturally, I decided I would post my thoughts here.

I would like to know if anyone ever refers to the pages of a book as "leaves" except in bad puns. I would like to know why my computer crashed when I tried to sign its registry. ("It is so beautiful here!!!") I would like to know why the only thing Minneapolis is near is St. Paul. I would like to know why Florida is even allowed to have a town called St. Petersburg, and why Ohio is allowed to have a town called Chicago.

A lot of streets are named after trees, a common one being "Elm Street," except that diseases have killed so many of the elm trees in this nation, and now a lot of Elm Streets don't have Elms on them. Well that's fine, but why trees? People are more important than trees. It would rule to live on Girl Scout Street or Heroin Addict On the Corner Street. I went to the town of Stoddard the other day, which is in western New Hampshire where nothing is, and sure enough there was nothing in it. Well, there was a Stoddard Town Hall, but I didn't have the key. There was a Stoddard Episcopal Church, too, which I assume gives me the right to convert them all. If only it had been Sunday!

Sometimes amazing coincidences don't happen. I was over in the administrative offices of my company earlier this afternoon, and I bumped into somebody that wasn't my old study partner in my intro to psychology class from eleven years ago.

Who was the guy that thought "left" and "right" were good directional terms? When ISN'T there confusion caused by someone saying, "So I go left, right?" and being answered with "Right"? "Left" is better but still a laden word. Sailors sought to fix this, but what happens if you say, "Head to port," and the port is on the right? Duck Dodgers rules the world by issuing directions such as "due up," particularly since he's drawing on his two dimensional map of space at the same time. If something is "due west" does that mean it's exactly west now or expected to be exactly west by some agreed-upon meeting time?

I have a water bottle at work, and I sip from it throughout the day. I never estimate how much I'll wind up drinking, so I either have to refill in the middle of the day, which requires needless exercise, or I have some left over at the end of the day. I hate to waste water like it falls out of the sky or something, but the thing is, water gets contaminated if you leave it in a sealed container overnight. Ever notice that? Screw the cap on the bottle tight -- makes no difference. If it's not refrigerated, that water is tainted forever after. Old water is, like, rotten or something. Leave it out, it goes bad. I drink it anyway.