> Breaking up isn't hard to do, I've realised - it's not sneaking a look at your watch whilst doing so. That's the difficult bit.

LOL.

> What I really wanted to ask her, though, was why she felt it necessary to "let me down gently" with such a cliched statement?

The cliche might just be due to a lack of imagination. Or, cliche or not, the honest truth.

Being hurt can be an extreme ordeal, depending on the circumstances, but it's a clean, honest kind of pain. Coming to the conclusion that you have to hurt someone else is difficult in its own way and more complex. It's not clean at all. Many would rather be hurt themselves than have another's hurt on their heads. Your ex's verbal dance was probably *partly* to make it easier for her and *entirely* to make it easier for you. (The two overlap: the easier it is for you, the easier it is for her, and a lot of honest concern would be mixed in as well.) She may have miscalculated what would be easiest for you, but it would be just that: a miscalculation.

Of course I don't know your ex, and for that matter I don't know this side of you very well, but I think it's fair to say that the above is a common, generic sort of scenario, and if you're at a loss about what fits where in your specific situation, the default is probably a good place to start.

Take care, Bourne. I have to say, I admire your sense of humor about it all.