That Dialectizer always sends me over the edge. So this time I went back and Dialectized one of my old posts and, if you can stand it, here it is:

ah guess this hyar is an open letter t'politicians an' law info'cement types. Do yer hankerin' t'take a bite outta crime? W'd yo' like t'put some criminals outta business, an' into th' pokey whar they belong? Jest boot up yer computer an' check yer email, ah reckon. Eff'n yo' git th' same stuff thet ah do, yo' will haf a nice neat list of crooks jest waitin' t'be bested, cuss it all t' tarnation. In a typical week, ah git about 100 scams in mah email, ah reckon. In addishun t'thet, ah git a couple of dozen viruses. Th' scam artists is af'er mah money an' th' virus creeps is out t'destroy mah computer. ah call thet stealin' an' van'alism, dawgone it. Both is aginst th' law. One virus comes fum someone who calls hisse'f Trimenjus Bost. He hits mah computer at least once a week an' recently tried t'git in six times in one day. Th' spam scams is usually sucker bait. Eff'n yo' will believe jest about ennythin', they will git yo'. They knows thet eff'n .01% of th' varmints they attack is a-gonna fall fo' their corn games, they is a-gonna make a lot of money. Fraud is t'other wo'd fo' thet. Also aginst th' law. Wif th' right sof'ware, thar sh'd be a way t'trace these criminals back t'their computer, an' sooner o' later, someone is a-gonna hafta does it. Th' varmints who fall fo' this hyar stuff simply kinnot affo'd it. Menny is older citizens who remember when yo' c'd trest varmints. Others is jest not mighty smart. Somebody has t'proteck them, dawgone it. Who will it be? Ebenezer

Sorry about that.
Howard