I am a half-elf, tortured by my half-elven, half-human nature.
I am a dwarf. I am dour and grumpy but secretly loving and tender.
I am a knight. I exist so I may die with honor and make everyone sad.
I am a doofus warrior. I exist solely to give Raistlin someone to insult.
I am an ultra-smart wizard, but I'm secretly evil. Har har har. Caramon, you're a doofus.
I am a Kender. I'm here for comic relief.
We are together again after five years of separation. Let's go do all the important stuff in the war that's about to happen, rise to amazingly high levels in our AD&D® character classes, and become heroes.(They do, and the reader hears DICE rolling in the background.)